Working and Stress With Complex Regional Pain Syndrome – Having this horrible disease and working is a challenge in itself, but what if you begin to have issues with work? What if you begin to feel if you are losing the capability of doing something you love? Things can begin to feel like they are unraveling.
As with everything, I have noticed with this disease it doesn’t just seem like one thing though, it seems like everything. Not just work, but every little thing in your life. Like you can’t do anything right, no matter what it is. Whether it is cooking, cleaning, or taking care of yourself.
Recently, I have had a co-worker who seems as though that everything I do is wrong. Even though, I have done this part of my job for well over 2 years, suddenly it is not right. I know it is, but for some reason or another, they have become critical of everything I do. This has caused a ton of un-needed stress and of course, with that it brings more pain. In order to reduce the stress from this, I gave that part of my job up. I know that they will find something else to fill it, but in order for me to feel better, I just had to stop doing it.
That is one thing I have learned with Complex Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS). In order to take better care of myself, I have to learn to let somethings go. I really decided to give it up for many reasons. In the process of all of this, I had began to feel like everything I touched was falling apart. My house was being neglected, I felt as though my husband was not happy, nothing was being done, and I felt like it was all my fault.
I also started to feel as though I was failing in other parts of my job. I have many hats where I work, and I began to feel like I was screwing up on the simplest things that I have again, done for many years. I started to feel like my boss was beginning to question my work. I guess he was in a way due to stupid mistakes. They weren’t anything huge, but they were mistakes none the less and I am a perfectionist. I had to take some “me” time to rethink this whole thing. I first started to wonder if maybe it was time for me to move on, but I love my job and the people I work for (most days) so that wasn’t it. I had to really think of what was best. I finally decided that the best thing to do was giving that part of my job up, to reduce the stress that as a CRPS patient doesn’t need. I decided to reduce stress by giving up something was the best option. And you know what? I am happy again.
The thing with this disease is we can no longer allow any extra stress then we already have. We don’t need it and really it is terrible for us. What I am saying is that if you are lucky or stubborn enough to continue working, DON’T keep things that stress you out. If you have an opportunity to let something go, do it. You will feel better and it will also make everything better. I know this won’t help everyone, but for those it will, I hope it will make you feel a bit better about losing some of the things you are used to doing. We can only do what our bodies allow.